Buddy the Gourd!

The Basement

April 17, 2004

You know nothing of life, if you haven't spent at least a few good hours in a basement. I've got a basement in my house and whenever the laundry gets done, I make an effort to get downstairs. I don't know why it's so alluring. Perhaps because it's usually behind a closed door. It's like a trip to the carnival, all those fascinating amusements, mesmerizing, dazzling and so often out of reach. There's usually an hour long trip in the car to get there. That's what they tell me. But my basement is close by, just behind a door.

Today is laundry day and my new person, well let's not call her that anymore, I learned that her name is Diane. But to preserve her anonymity let's refer to her as Frances. Anyway, "Frances" is kind of sleepy today, doesn't know what to do with her time and is dawdling with the laundry, slowly moving one sock after the other into the waiting machine. I've made it downstairs and she's ignoring me.

In previous visits, I've hung out amid the paint cans. Sat in the window wells. Jumped to the top of the empty shelves that previous owners left behind. I've jumped up and sat on the spare furnace filters, threaded my way behind the washer and dryer and water pipes. Perhaps Frances had imagined that I had already gotten into everything and she could safely ignore me.

Today I was more adventurous still. I wanted to make a quantum leap in exploration. You could say that I did that. I jumped from the top of the bookshelf into the rafters! Did you know that there are these metal shafts that you can sit on top of once you get up there? There are also wires going every which way and pipes and you're up really high, you get a great view of the room.

Having finally gotten her laundry going, Frances looked around for me. I wasn't anywhere to be seen. When she reached the small room with the bookshelves I put out a very quiet meow. She couldn't believe that I was up there. Hee, hee.

Later, she would try to tell me that she had had a premonition of the rafters being the next place that I would get into. What do you think? Is that a lot of baloney or what?

Anyway, I had all this horrible gunk attached to my head and ears. She tried to coax me down and when I resisted she went for a chair. I twisted around and planted myself firmly on top of the metal shaft. She returned in a minute or two and kept encouraging me to come down. Okay, finally I agreed, it was a little messy up here. I gracefully jumped back to the shelf and she grabbed me.

I had a wide gray stripe on my back, that's what Frances said. She tried to brush me off and then she gave me a sort of sponge bath with a towel. I was pretty dirty. Soon it was discovered that my stomach had more sticky gunk and generalized dirt. She tried to clean my stomach but after a short while I resisted and attacked.

As I write this, my stomach fur is still gummy and sooty and my head feels a little crusty. But that's me -- I'm Smuf -- I'm a street cat at heart.

- Posted by Smuf at 12:05 PM